Tag Archives: irish

Plastic Paddy’s Wake (and Bake)

 

To celebrate the occasion of St. Padraig’s Day (specifically the 73 people arrest at UMass Amherst’s “Blarney Blowout” this past weekend), I’ve taken an old traditional Irish song and updated for the dudebro crowd. You’re welcome.

five by five hundred

(to the tune of “Finnegan’s Wake”)

Plastic Paddy lived on Linden Street,
A mutt with a tinge of Irish blood.
His North Shore accent wicked sweet
and in his life, smoked too much bud.
So he had a sort of a tipplin’ way
With a love for jäger bombs he was born.
And to help him get to class each day:
Sambuca in his Dunkies ev’ry morn.

CHORUS:
Chug, Chug, Chug, bro, let’s do shots
’til you hit the floor and your stomach aches.
Dudebro, it’s a rager here
At Plastic Paddy’s wake and bake!

One night he shotgunned too much beer.
His head felt heavy, which made him shake.
He fell from the second floor balcony
And they gathered around to help him wake.
They moved him to the futon
where they slapped him twice upside the head.
Someone panicked, “Call the cops!”
when they felt for sure that…

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Athbhliain Faoi Mhaise Dhaoibh!

(that’s “Happy New Years” in Irish, ‘natch)

It’s a busy end to the Holiday Season, with back-to-back-to-back celebrations, but here’s a quick update on some things. First, a little New Years poem I wrote over at Five By Five Hundred about 2012’s significant lack of jetpacks. I also wrote a little blog / essay about my brain as a writer entitled “Less Talk, More Rock” for the Boston One Minute Play Festival, which is this coming weekend, January 5-7, at Boston Playwrights Theatre, and features two short plays that I wrote. I have very specifically avoided rehearsals, so I’m excited to see what’s going to come out of the little bits of text I wrote. If you’re interested but unavailable to make it to the show, the 8pm performance on Sunday, January 6 will be streamed live on HowlRound’s NewPlay TV, so you can watch the whole thing from the comfort of your laptop.

That’s all for now; see you in The Future!

Lá Fhéile Pádraig!

Anyone who knows me can vouch for the fact that I love being Irish. I hold a great deal of pride in the culture, a feeling ingrained in me by my father since a very young age. We also know, of course, that I do enjoy drinking (as if the homebrewing section of my website weren’t enough of an indicator). That being said, St. Paddy’s Day (and that’s “Paddy” for Pádraig, mind you. “Patty” is a girl’s name, or what you might call a hamburger) inspires some conflicting feelings within me. I love the celebration of my heritage, and the recognition that it brings to such a unique and fascinating culture. But I find myself being constantly aggravated at the Plastic Paddies and rampant racism that accompanies the holiday. Sure, I plan on heading over to the pub on the 17th to enjoy a few pints, but that’s not all there is. I plan on taking in a few Irish seisiuns, enjoying the music and the culture of Ireland, in addition to the drink. Too many people are happy to diminish the accomplishments of the Irish people and reduce us to alcoholic slobs. And while a great many of us do take to the drink — as well as there are many who actually suffer from alcoholism, which is far from humorous — there’s much more about the Irish to celebrate. Unfortunately, most complaints about the depiction of Irish stereotypes in American culture are quickly brushed aside as essentially “white people problems.” Despite the fact the Irish are generally an accepted — and celebrated — culture in modern day America (especially in Boston!), many seem to forget the years of struggle that our ancestors went through. Sure, it hasn’t much affected me directly — no one’s ever called me a “white nigger,” or pointed to a sign saying “No Irish Need Apply” — but it affected my family, and thus, it’s had affect on how I grew up and who I am today.

This week’s post on Five By Five Hundred is brought to you by Brian Boru, Flann O’Brien, James Joyce, Fionn MacCumhaill, Brendan Behan, Samuel Beckett, Cuchulain, Maewyn Succa, and all of the other bright and brilliant faces of Irish culture that have had a positive impact worldwide.

“Nina Never Loved Me” on FiveByFiveHundred.com

(also, while you’re at it, I suggest you check out The Shore, the newest Oscar-winning short film by Terry George)

A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

It’s been a busy week ’round this here parts, so no brand new post over at Five By Five Hundred. Instead, and in honor of James Joyce’s body of work becoming public domain, I’ve shared an oldie-but-goodie that I wrote about 5 years ago, inspired by the first and last lines of Joyce’s magnum opus, Finnegans Wake (no, I haven’t read the whole think, but I’ve read some of it). It’s a little avant-garde, but it’s one I’m pretty proud of from back in the day.

“(riverrun)” at FiveByFiveHundred.com

Le Fheile Padraig

Alright, so my commitment to posting a new cover song every 2 weeks has fallen behind. I’ve been recovering from a sinus infection, which of course has rendered me unable to sing.

But serendipity shined its smiling Irish eyes on me, and I was able to finish just in time for the Feast of Saint Patrick (one of my personal favorite holidays). This entry into the Song of the (Bi-)Week series is a cover of “Streams of Whiskey” by the Irish rock group The Pogues. This song pays homage to two of my favorite things: drinking whiskey, and Irish playwright/author Brendan Behan, who is also the namesake of my favorite local pub (where I often enjoy drinking whiskey). The original song is an sloppy, upbeat drinking song in 4/4 time; my version follows more in the tradition of Americana, complete with plenty of lap steel guitar, and converts the meter to 3/4 time.

Enjoy, and have yourselves a wonderful St. Patrick’s Day!

Song of the (Bi-)Week, Week 3: “Don’t Think Twice”

A little late — first because my internet access was out, and then because I was trapped on the worst MegaBus ride ever, and then because I was time traveling to 1920s Philadelphia, which caused all sorts of problems.

But I’m back now, and I brought t-shirts for everybody! Well, maybe not t-shirts. But at least this song. Just out of time for Valentine’s Day, enjoy an atmospheric Irish wake of Bob Dylan’s “Don’t Think Twice.” And tell my lap steel guitar how sorry you are for the awful things I did to it in order to make those sounds.